I have almost survived the first week

So, interspersed between an overwhelming sense that I have absolutely no clue how to teach English has been a lot of fun and maybe even some learning, both by me and my students.

Today is only my fourth day, so I am clear that I am taking things way more seriously and personally than would probably be in anyone's best interest, and yet that is so.

Yesterday was a tough one. My first class (10th grade) went great--as it has each day so far. I don't know what it is about that class, exactly, but I feel super comfortable with those kids. They are such sweethearts and really great kids, and (not but) they definitely have lots of energy that could get out of control, but that's just how I like it. My 9th graders are timid and quiet and look at me like I'm a combination between a scary monster--too intimidating to ask a question to in front of the whole class or something--and an incompetent idiot.

So, in my 9th grade class, I hadn't explained something adequately on day 2 (I said it once and thought they got it, plus thought they would know this from previous classes, but they didn't), and nobody asked me any questions about it or indicated they were confused, which meant that on day 3, they didn't really do their homework properly and just gave me blank stares as I tried to put them in small groups to discuss what they'd done for homework (which I had not checked yet). Anyway, I suppose what happened was not a big deal and happens one way or another all the time in school--where a teacher didn't explain something well enough and then needs to backpeddle to explain further--but I feel like I got a little flustered since I really hadn't wanted to spend a long time on this point and felt some self-imposed pressure to move along since we have a lot to cover. I think if my master teacher hadn't been observing me, it wouldn't have been as big a deal to me, although she was actually really helpful. She even raised her hand to ask a question: "Could you give another example and write it on the board?" she asked. That was amazingly helpful. I somehow just don't think to write things down sometimes. But so the class was about to come to an end and I realized that the homework I had told them they'd have at the beginning of the class now wasn't totally appropriate, but I only had a minute to change my mind, and I wasn't thrilled with what I ended up telling them. I also forgot to tell them to bring their textbook with them the next day (today), which we actually wouldn't have gotten to today anyway, but I didn't know that at the time.

Anyway, today went really well. My mean master teacher (as I refer to her to friends) and I resolved the journal issue well yesterday, and I told the students today, and that went well. I told them I changed my mind and wouldn't be checking their journals, but their journals were still theirs to keep and my gift to them. One student asked cutely if they could count for extra credit, but I had to tell him no. I gave them some encouragement to write anyway, though, and told them I'd check in with them at various points about whether they were writing. But that went well. I had been concerned they might see my changing my mind as just another example of me not having my shit together, but I think I explained it well (and did so by not giving any reason whatsoever for why I had changed my mind).

I also knew yesterday that I'd need to bring my best game today to the 9th grade class to wrap up the confusion from yesterday's class and move on quickly, and I think I managed to do that really well.

Today was also great because I had two students come see me for extra help. They are SO cute! One girl, a 9th grader, is from Honduras (just moved here 3 years ago) and wanted me to look at what she'd written so far for her short story, which was about her life in Honduras. What she wrote was so beautiful and touching--reminiscing about her grandmother throwing her surprise parties and big family dinners and vacations on the river. She definitely had lots of grammatical mistakes, especially with tenses, but I offered to meet with her regularly for extra help with this, which, as it happens, is actually a requirement for one of my classes at SFSU.

Also, two students didn't have their homework for me yesterday, and I talked to them both and they both had it for me today, which I was glad to see.

This is a crazy long post that ignores the tendonitis in my wrists, the prep I need to do for tomorrow (finish my assessment sheet for their story and prepare my lesson plans for next week in preparation for my weekly meeting with the mean master teacher tomorrow morning), and how badly I just want to go to sleep, even though it's only 8:30.

I do want to keep this blog current for myself (and all of you fans at home), and I feel like what I wrote above is what there was for me to say.

Lila tov